It’s yet again been quite a while since I’ve been on here. I haven’t felt like writing lately, and truth be told, 2014 didn’t get the start I thought it would.
I decided this year not to make resolutions because I always seem to let myself down, even more so than if I never made the resolution in the first place. I decided, rather, to keep on track with making goals for myself instead. Resolutions= TOO MUCH PRESSURE!. I decided to keep working on projects around the house, try to keep up with my fitness goals, and work to inflate my savings (unlike the deflating i’ve been doing lately).
January 1st felt no different than December 31st. Without a resolution, it was just another day, month, and year. Jason and I always plan trips and talk about what we want to do in the coming months all the time – what vacation we would like to go on, planning hiking trips, date nights, etc. Then suddenly we lost our little Franklin. He had been having terrible bouts of pain and we couldn’t keep putting him through that. We lost something we had grown to love tremendously over a short period of time. Within just a day, the new year felt so bleak. It wasn’t just another day and another month anymore, it was heartbreaking for us to loose such a wonderful companion so soon after the new year. We had looked forward to doing so much with Franklin in the coming year: dog parks, road trips, hiking. He had become a family member.
What made the lose more difficult for us was the feeling of having hope torn from us. Soon after adopting Franklin we found out he had a liver shunt, but were given a great outlook by our vet. On the night his pain became unbearable we took him to the emergency vet. During this trip, we were given a very bleak outlook with lots of facts that hadn’t been presented to us by our regular vet, and were faced with the most heartbreaking decision we’ve had to make as a couple. We were visiting Jason’s Mom in Pennsylvania at the time and were grateful to have her support throughout the entire ordeal. The ability to be with family during such a hard time was a gift.
We were deeply saddened over the lose of our dog and knew only time would help heal the void we were left with. It has been a few weeks and we have accepted the lose, but miss the little guy every day. It’s still hard to walk into a room and not have him following by my heels and jumping on my lap. It’s difficult to sit here in my office and not not see his little face sleeping in his bed by my window. He was with us for such a short time, but he made a huge impression on us and wiggled his way into our hearts.
While a big part of me is afraid of the possibility of going through the same thing again, we have talked about getting a new dog when we feel ready. Not only did Franklin show us the unconditional love of a dog…Franklin taught us to have more patience, selflessness, and compassion. And for that, we are grateful for every second we had with him. For that, we are excited to some day show another dog the same love we were able to give Franklin.